1) I am pleased because it will give me a way to monetize the site.

2) Now, having said that, more importantly, I will be able to recommend products that have helped me immeasurably the last 3 decades to grow as a human being, both personally and professionally. I do sincerely hope that when I recommend a product that you take the recommendation seriously and click through on the links and at least take a look at what is offered. I believe that I have purchased, listened to and learned from every audio program published by Nightingale Conant the past 30+ years. I owe much of who I am and what I have to their authors and publishers.

When I was much younger, I would spend countless hours at the side of my maternal grandfather. I am the oldest son of his only daughter. He took over my life at a very young age and had a significant influence on my life. One of his greatest concerns for me was that I get an “education.” To grandpa an education meant a college degree, period. This is something he longed for and never had the opportunity to obtain during his lifetime. However, the word “education” has meant much more than that to me in my life.

I began my odyssey to earn a college degree when I was 18 years old and earned my BFA 2 months after I turned 31. My journey took me from coast to coast and in-between. I ended up graduating with my degree having earned enough hours to have a PhD if I would have just remained more focused. My challenge has always been wanting to see and experience it all – whatever “it all” meant at the various stages in my life and development. I still suffer from it as I have not seen and experienced everything – yet.

I love science and physics, the social sciences, the humanities, history, and about every class I could take. However, when I headed down the path of design and art, I was hooked. Studying design and art truly teaches one how to think and observe the world around them. Knowing how to pay attention and analyze what one observes creates some important advantages in life. Once one learns the principles of art and design and how they relate to everything around them, they are able to creatively handle the challenges life throws their way.

Because of my grandfather’s insistence that I become “degreed” I became a life-long learner. This has meant everything to me. At a very young age I developed the habit of learning something new and different every day. This has done two things for me…

First, I know a lot of “stuff.” I am finding out that the older I get it is a great advantage as I can clearly see “the bigger picture” in most instances. At minimum, many others come to me with difficulties when they want a very fresh, different, or, we might even say, off-point, solution to their challenge.
Second, the more I learn, the more I realize how little I really know. This is a great advantage because knowing how little we know tends to keep us focused, hungry, and humble. When one realizes how small they are compared to the immensity of the universe they tend to become a little more centered. They tend to gain a healthy respect for… well… everything!

Short of earning a degree there are numerous ways in which one can “learn,” however, these multiple ways of learning fall mainly into two categories; learning from our own experience and/or learning from the experience of another.

We start out in life learning from our own experience. We must learn how to walk, what things taste like, how things feel physically as well as emotionally, etc. Many things we must experience for ourselves to learn. However, it is as if the Universe intends us to learn the things we must experience personally – once. If we insist on learning most things through our own experience, matriculating at this particular institution will become extremely costly in both seasons and substance. Life dictates that we pick and choose our teachers and classrooms carefully and with ever increasing sapience.

If we don’t learn from our own experience we, of all creatures, are certainly doomed. We are destined to repeat the same mistakes over and over without ever improving our situation. While this may be fun for others to watch, it is certainly devastating to experience. Eventually, one does “wake-up” or become “enlightened” as to how their thought patterns and behavior have hurt them. Once they realize the error of their ways, they are inevitably angry, discouraged, and, if not completely broken by the process, more than a little determined to correct things.

If we are wise and want to accelerate our learning and growth, we will insist that the bulk of our instruction come from another’s experience. This process will certainly demand some investment of time, attention, and treasure, however, it is almost always less costly than learning from our own experience. Learning from others can save us countless hours of effort, much pain and discouragement, and untold wealth.

Learning from others takes many forms. We can attain a formal education, often institutionalized, from universities, colleges, and trade schools. These are great ways to obtain knowledge. However, one must be vigilant that they are broadening their perspective and gaining knowledge and information to enhance their own decision-making rather than being indoctrinated in certain thought processes and opinions that seem to pervade these institutions.
We can also learn from training companies that offer seminars and classes. These organizations offer learning that is often industry specific and enhances ones trade or professional knowledge and skills through certification.

Another popular way to gain knowledge is through reading groups, clubs, and trade organizations. Though usually started by like-minded individuals or individuals with a common purpose or interest, these groups can be a source of valuable interaction and may lead to new insights as you discuss various topics if you are careful to include many individuals with unique viewpoints and opinions.

Usually, when we refuse to learn from another’s experience, it is the result of our flawed thinking that we are somehow different from, rather than similar to, another. Sometimes it takes a crisis of some type to jolt us into the new day when we realize that we are all humans, part of “humanity,” and that the notion of “individualness” is really just “personal style.”

Once we awaken to the fact that we are part of something much bigger, we become more open to the process and idea of learning from another’s experience. I personally believe that the only way we are able to accelerate our growth is by walking the paths others have blazed when available and appropriate. It makes no sense to me to blaze a trail just 2 or 3 feet to the left or right of an existing trail so we can revel in our individuality or personal “cleverness.”

How, exactly, do we learn from others? The best way, of course, is if you have a wonderful teacher, mentor, or a personal coach. Short of that, reading books, listening to audio programs, and attending seminars or classes are all critical components of any life-long educational process.
This is why I recommend the programs manufactured and sold by Nightingale Conant Corporation.

They will help you become better personally and professionally. They represent the best instruction in their industry. And, by best, I mean quality, content, and accessibility. If you don’t need industry specific training, I highly recommend that you sign up for Nightingale Conant’s Insiders Club. I’ve been a member for years and have benefited far more from the instruction and positive changes in my life than from the nominal fee required to join and participate. This may be the one investment you can make in your life that will bring you returns in excess of your investment many times over.

Lastly, whether our attaining to knowledge and experience includes learning from others or from our own experience, the critical component is, after the knowledge has been gained or the experience had, in order to truly gain wisdom we must be quiet and reflect and meditate upon the new information. If we do not take the time to reflect and meditate upon the new information and comprehend how it may or may not affect our understanding and our view of ourselves and all else, we really have not learned anything. …we have just wasted our time and treasure.

Russ Bethers, July 2010

All material COPYRIGHT© 2010, Russell R. Bethers, Offpoint, Inc., USA
You are free to link to this post, however, No part of this material in any form or portion may be used without the prior written permission of the author.

I am the eldest son of a strong type A father who has spent his life telling other what to do and when to do it (very rarely why to do it or how to do it) and a stronger type A mother who has spent her life telling me and my 5 siblings what to do and when to do it, many times how to do it and often times demanding to know why we did it. She being the only child of a wonderful, rather demanding, man who loved life and other living things, and spent his life working the land and running cattle through the beautiful mountains of Northern Utah. All good people who have shared their DNA with me… bless their souls!

And, if that is not enough, I was strongly encouraged to be potty-trained at a very young age. (Evidence presented herewith…) There was a time I felt I had no chance in life.

Potty Training at Two Months Old. ...'nuff said!

If that wasn’t enough, I then pursued a career that demanded every creative expression I produced be placed in front of others for critiquing… for criticism, to be torn apart into its smallest pieces and judged for its right to be.

I was expected, encouraged, required, exhorted, and, some might say, demanded… to be perfect. To excel, exceed, outperform, surpass, transcend… and please everyone else. That is, until I said “enough is enough!”

“…no, really… well, because that’s the way I feel… …is that too strong? Really? I’m sorry… please forgive me… I promise to try harder, do better, pay more attention… and never do THAT again… PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE! …like me… …I’m trying to be perfect… Really!”

I went round and round with this until I finally realized one day that what I was pursuing was not only impossible and disheartening, it was killing me. “Perfection” is a mindset and a concept that causes nothing but pain and heartache. …sometimes the heartache is literal…

I determined that if I were to not only to survive, but “excel” or be “excellent” in my life, I must move past the perfect mindset. Perfection is impossible. Excellence is, not only attainable, but preferable, and much more fulfilling. It took the better part of forty years to understand that perfection is a lie. It is a lie that hurt then, hurts now, and will hurt in the future. It is damming. It stops progress. If not handled properly, growth is sacrificed for the pursuit of perfection as it is impossible to be, do, and know everything, and to never offend, disappoint, or hurt anyone else… to be perfect.

If you cannot stop the pursuit of perfection and concentrate on being excellent in your life, you’ll quit taking chances or risks. Quit taking chances or risks, or putting yourself in situations where you are uncomfortable, and you’ll cease to learn. If you cease learning, you’ll block personal growth. And, ironically, if you cannot grow, you’ll never, ever approach excellence! …let alone perfection.

Every time I notice this terrible monster returning, I have to remind myself that, at its very center, I believe life is a journey of adventure, an almost mystical opportunity to challenge our intellect, a quest that stretches our heart and broadens our understanding.

Living is a unique opportunity to learn and grow, love and be loved, to give and take, share and receive, and, through the process, make a positive contribution to the lives of all we touch both directly and indirectly during our many journeys and adventures.

I believe that life’s journey is taken one step at a time. As great paintings are developed and appear one small stroke, one small adjustment in color, balance, tone, and texture at a time, so great lives are designed one small selection—one decision—at a time. Our lives are the result of the hundreds of small choices and selections we make every day.

At times, if we are actively engaged in life, we will experience large, even gargantuan shifts in understanding and direction. These sometimes happen by choice. However, more often than not, growth is forced upon us by the universe. If we pay attention, are wide awake, and properly understand the principle of perspective, personal growth and brilliance, new opportunity, and the thrill of pursuing a new adventure are, more often than not, the result of these challenges.

I believe that life—like art, design, and the universe—is about balance, tension, harmony, contrast, purpose, intent, patterns, proportions, themes, restrictions, parameters, and formal as well as contextual elements.

I believe that life is about growth and change—preferably purposely created and intended. It is about new and different perspectives, ever-increasing vistas, and deeper understandings.

I believe that life is about helping others—those we know and love and those we love but don’t yet know—to find happiness and joy along their chosen life paths. I believe with every cell of my very human heart that life is about relationships. I believe that life is about the mind and the heart and about the relationships that cause each to grow.

My only hope in writing Warming Trends™ and making posts in Offpoint Chatter™ is to perhaps cause you to pause and reflect before you make a judgment about some future situation. I hope to encourage you to consider other perspectives and other dynamics that may be at work and perhaps, just perhaps, to make a better selection than one you may have made using the limitations of your current understanding or rote patterns of thought and behavior.

…and do it while completely ignoring The Perfect Lie.

Russ Bethers, April 2010

All material COPYRIGHT© 2010, Russell R. Bethers, Offpoint, Inc., USA
You are free to link to this post, however, No part of this material in any form or portion may be used without the prior written permission of the author.

It has been my experience that action usually creates “dust” – or evidence of activity – however, not all action leads to progress. Sometimes this falls into the category of keeping oneself busy because one is too fearful to face the rigors of a truly adventurous life of discovery.

A few years ago, there was a morning when I awoke terrified by the looming day and all that it held. I was in a place where it seemed the Universe was pounding me for every poor choice and questionable decision that I had made to that point in my life.

As I looked back on the previous decade, it seemed that at every opportunity where I had a choice to make I made the wrong selection.

At that moment I realized that I needed to change my thought processes, the direction my life was taking, the path I was walking, some of the individuals I had chosen as traveling companions and many philosophies by which I had planned my journey.

I realized that the little cottage I had built so carefully out in the middle of the plain and surrounded with a wall and mote to keep life out was the very thing that had attracted the attention and wrath of everything that I had feared. I realized in an instant that I had spent years building motes and walls – hiding from life hoping it would not find and hurt me again. However, it did.

I learned that life does not treat kindly those who attempt to hide from it.

Fortunately, I had placed the responsibility for my predicament squarely where it should have been – on me. I knew that I was solely responsible for my miserable situation. I alone had been the one behind the wheel of my little jalopy as it careened out of control ending up at the bottom of some lonely, hot, and dusty ravine leaving me bloodied, desperate, and thirsty. I was running scared – terrified of life – and I was old enough to know better.

When I was younger, my grandfather would often ask me “if I’d learned anything valuable?” He would usually bring this up after I had a hard lesson. He was not one to give a lot of direction before hand, however, he was brilliant at helping me see the lessons in my experiences and how the choices I made affected the outcomes in those situations.

One day, just before I was to leave for college when we had finished working in the field moving the bales of hay into a stack, he asked me if “I had gained three years of experience in High School or had merely had one year’s experience three times?” I didn’t fully understand this question until a few years passed and I had heard it from many other people in other contexts. The importance of learning from my experiences has since been a critical principle as I’ve traveled my path in life.

How about you? Are you hiding from life or are you learning new things? Having new adventures? Making new discoveries? About yourself? About others? About the world around you? About how you fit into the universe? Does your life and living mean something? What? Too whom? Most importantly, are you happy?

I have found that satisfaction and happiness in my life is tied directly to new journeys of adventure and discovery.

There is perhaps nothing that I dislike more than covering the same ground over and over and over again. I like new things! I like experiences that cause me to grow. I like learning new things that force me to reconsider all that I believe. I like to be interrupted, awakened from my habit-induced fog, encouraged to see everything in a new light. I like action that causes progress for that is the only way our perspective will change and we will gain wisdom. I believe that wisdom is the result of a life well lived. Living to learn is the only way we can truly learn how to live.

In my opinion, there is only one time when the mere action of causing dust might cause some progress. That is when one might revisit some experience or something that happened in the past, dust it off and bring it out into the light of day and deal with it. There are times when it is important to visit the dark corners of one’s mind and reconsider past choices and the results. I certainly do not advocate one doing this until it becomes a manic obsession. Revisiting the past to learn from it should be a “weekend visit with old friends to reminisce about things fond, shared, but mostly forgotten,” not to “move into an old house haunted by every mistake we have made.”

“We learn from history that we do not learn from history,” is an old yarn used by those who love the study of History. I believe that is a true observation.

Applied personally, do we really learn from our own unique, individual “history?”

Have we had three years experience or have we had one years experience three times?

I believe these are important questions to consider as we contemplate change and progress in our lives.

Russ Bethers, March 2010

All material COPYRIGHT© 2010, Russell R. Bethers, Offpoint, Inc., USA
You are free to link to this post, however, No part of this material in any form or portion may be used without the prior written permission of the author.